Saturday, May 06, 2006

Relationship Autopsy

What went wrong with your last relationship? What role did you play? How can you move on with a healthy outlook? Here are some questions that will help you get to the bottom of your situation:

-Was my fate sealed before I started because I chose someone with whom I was incompatible? If so, what was it about him that made us incompatible? Am I choosing someone with similar traits now?

-Did I get married for the wrong reasons-for financial stability, out of fear of loneliness, or because of someone else's wishes?

-Did we neglect to talk before we got married about sex, religion, in-laws, money, children, or work roles?

-Did actions I took or failed to take harm the marriage?

-Did I have unrealistic expectations? If so, am I bringing those same illusions with me into a new relationship?

-We teach people how to treat us. Did I teach my partner to treat me badly?

-What choices did I make in my last relationship that led to the results I got?

-What pain do I still feel, and how can I get the emotional closure I need in order to heal? What remnants of my last relationship do I want to leave behind?

****"Remember, the first great step is to like yourself enough to pick someone who likes you too." -Jane O'Reilly*****

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