****Excerpt from the book Never Guilty, Never Free
By Ginny Foat with Laura Foreman
Why did I stay with him? I must have been asked that question a thousand times by now. I must have asked it myself ten thousand times. The trouble is, there's no easy answer. Or rather, there's no one answer. There are a lot of different explanations that apply to different times.
I stayed with him, at first, because he made me feel good about myself. I stayed because I loved him, because leaving would have meant another failure, and I was terrified of failing again. I stayed because I believed him after the first beating, or the second, or the third, when he said it would never happen again, and when he begged my forgiveness. I stayed because I accepted the blame for having provoked him.
I stayed because I had nowhere else to go and I didn't know what else to do. I stayed because I was afraid of being alone and because I was ashamed. I stayed, eventually, because I was afraid of what he would do to me if I left. At the time I had no way of understanding what was happening to me. I thought that I was being beaten because there was something wrong with me, some shameful flaw in me, that brought it on. That had to be true, I thought, because other women, good women, weren't being beaten by their husbands or lovers. Oh, maybe it happened in the slums sometimes to poor, degraded people who couldn't help themselves. But it didn't happen to people I knew, to the women who lived next door, or down the street. It was happening only to me. I was guilty, for some reason, and I was alone.
I couldn't know, then, that there were millions of women just like me, exactly how many no one is certain even today, since spousal abuse remains one of the country's most underreported crimes. One conservative estimate is that forty million American women will suffer a serious beating by an intimate partner at some time during their lives. And two thousand to three thousand women die each year at the hands of a husband, a lover, or an ex-partner.
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Pedal
At first, I saw God as my observer, my judge, keeping track of the things I did wrong, so as to know whether I merited heaven or hell when I die. He was out there sort of like a president. I recognized His picture when I saw it, But I really didn't know Him.
But later on when I met Christ, it seemed as though life were rather like a bike ride, but it was a tandem bike, and I noticed that Christ was in the back helping me pedal.
I don't know just when it was that he suggested we change places, but life has not been the same since. When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring, but predictable... It was the shortest distance between two points.
But when He took the lead, He knows the delightful long cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places at breakneck speeds, it was all I could do to hang on! Even though it looked like madness, He said, "Pedal!"
I worried and was anxious and asked, "Where are you taking me?" He laughed and didn't answer, and I started to learn to trust. I forgot my boring life and entered into the adventure. And when I'd say, "I'm scared," He'd lean back and touch my hand.
He took me to people with gifts that I needed, gifts of healing, acceptance, and joy. They gave me gifts to take on my journey, my Lord's and mine.
And we're off again. He said, "Give the gifts away; they're extra baggage, too much weight." So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving I received, and still our burden was light.
I did not trust him at first, in control of my life. I thought He'd wreck it; but he knows bike secrets, knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners, knows how to jump to clear high rocks, knows how to fly to shorten scary passages.
And I am learning to shut up and pedal in the strangest places, and I'm beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face with my delightful constant companion, Jesus Christ.
And when I'm sure I just can't do anymore, He just smiles and says.... "Pedal."
~ Original Text Author Unknown ~
But later on when I met Christ, it seemed as though life were rather like a bike ride, but it was a tandem bike, and I noticed that Christ was in the back helping me pedal.
I don't know just when it was that he suggested we change places, but life has not been the same since. When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring, but predictable... It was the shortest distance between two points.
But when He took the lead, He knows the delightful long cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places at breakneck speeds, it was all I could do to hang on! Even though it looked like madness, He said, "Pedal!"
I worried and was anxious and asked, "Where are you taking me?" He laughed and didn't answer, and I started to learn to trust. I forgot my boring life and entered into the adventure. And when I'd say, "I'm scared," He'd lean back and touch my hand.
He took me to people with gifts that I needed, gifts of healing, acceptance, and joy. They gave me gifts to take on my journey, my Lord's and mine.
And we're off again. He said, "Give the gifts away; they're extra baggage, too much weight." So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving I received, and still our burden was light.
I did not trust him at first, in control of my life. I thought He'd wreck it; but he knows bike secrets, knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners, knows how to jump to clear high rocks, knows how to fly to shorten scary passages.
And I am learning to shut up and pedal in the strangest places, and I'm beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face with my delightful constant companion, Jesus Christ.
And when I'm sure I just can't do anymore, He just smiles and says.... "Pedal."
~ Original Text Author Unknown ~
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
The Greatest Pain
The greatest pain in life is not to die, but to be ignored.
--- To lose the person you love so much to another who doesn't care at all.
--- To have someone you care about throw a party... and not tell you about it.
--- When your favorite person on earth neglects to invite you to his graduation.
--- To have people think that you don't care.
The greatest pain in life, is not to die, but to be forgotten.
--- To be left in the dust after another's great achievement.
--- To never get a call from a loved one, just saying "hi".
--- When you show someone your innermost thoughts and they laugh in your face.
--- For others to always be too busy to console you when you need someone to lift your spirits.
--- When it seems like the only person who cares about you, is you.
--- Life is full of pain, but does it ever get better?
Will people ever care about each other, and make time for those who are in need?
Each of us has a part to play in this great show we call life.
Each of us has a duty to mankind to tell others we love them.
If you do not care about others you will not be punished.
You will simply be ignored...
forgotten...
as you have done to others.
--- To lose the person you love so much to another who doesn't care at all.
--- To have someone you care about throw a party... and not tell you about it.
--- When your favorite person on earth neglects to invite you to his graduation.
--- To have people think that you don't care.
The greatest pain in life, is not to die, but to be forgotten.
--- To be left in the dust after another's great achievement.
--- To never get a call from a loved one, just saying "hi".
--- When you show someone your innermost thoughts and they laugh in your face.
--- For others to always be too busy to console you when you need someone to lift your spirits.
--- When it seems like the only person who cares about you, is you.
--- Life is full of pain, but does it ever get better?
Will people ever care about each other, and make time for those who are in need?
Each of us has a part to play in this great show we call life.
Each of us has a duty to mankind to tell others we love them.
If you do not care about others you will not be punished.
You will simply be ignored...
forgotten...
as you have done to others.
The Flow Of Life
If the sky above seems cloudy,
And you are left out in the rain,
If you are searching for a rainbow,
But the colors bring you pain,
If your world is not revolving,
And there is no end in sight,
If you are looking for the sunshine,
But all you see is night,
If all around are smiling,
But all you can do is frown,
If you are tired of all this living,
When life just brings you down,
Then look beyond your teardrops,
At the wonders of this land,
The beauty of a flower,
Like velvet in your hand.
Feel the air around you,
The smell of new mown hay,
Laughing children in the park,
The innocence there at play,
Imagine floating with a butterfly,
As she flutters between the trees,
Or the whispers of the ocean,
On warm hot summer's breeze,
Think of the taste of candy floss,
As it melts upon your tongue,
Or the melody of morning birds,
As they greet each day with song,
Remember words of beauty,
Told in your mother's embrace,
Feel the gentleness of her touch,
As she softly kissed your face,
Seek the good within you,
Cast the clouds from your sky,
Don't look toward the pavement,
But hold your head up high,
Think not what life owes you,
But of all you have to give,
Forget about tomorrow,
Then you can start to live.
So Bless this age your are living in,
With the gifts you can bestow,
Don't disregard the stream of life,
Go gently with the flow.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Rules For Being Human
from Chicken Soup for the Soul
by Jack Canfield (Editor) & Mark Victor Hansen
1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around.
2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full time informal school called life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid.
3. There are no mistakes, only lessons .Growing is a process of trial and error, experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much of the process as the experiment that ultimately "works."
4. A lesson is repeated until it is learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. Then you can go to the next lesson.
5. Learning lessons does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.
6. "There" is no better than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there that again, looks better than "here."
7. Others are merely mirrors of you. You can not love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.
8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need; what you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.
9. The answers lie inside you. The answers to life's questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.
Soft Isn't So Weak
A man is born gentle and weak.
At his death he is hard and stiff.
Green plants are tender and filled with sap.
At their death they are withered and dry.
Therefore the stiff and unbending is the disciple of death.
The gentle and yielding is the disciple of life.
Thus an army without flexibility never wins a battle.
A tree that is unbending is easily broken.
The hard and strong will fall.
The soft and weak will overcome.
by: Lau Tsu, 6th Century BC
Monday, February 20, 2006
What The Bible Really Says
THE VALUE OF EACH HUMAN LIFE
"Let us make man in Our image, according to our likeness...and God created man in His own image"
(Genesis 1:26-27)
Man and woman were made in God's image. The image of God is the basis for the dignity, care and respect of all human life. Consequently, there is no basis for developing a "power structure" over another person.
THE REJECTION OF VIOLENCE IN MARRIAGE
"Help me, O Lord from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from the violent man; who purposes to overthrow my life" (Psalms 140:4)
Church Leadership Qualifications = "not violent" (I Tim. 3:3)
Violence has and will be a problem. The Bible states that violence is not an option for church leadership nor should it be a part of the human experience. The use of violence is to "overthrow" another person's life in order to facilitate one's own desires.
SUBMISSION AND THE BIBLE
"Wives be subject to your own husbands" (Ephesians 5:22)
"Husbands love your wives" (Ephesians 5:25)
There are several important points to note from these passages:
* Submission means:
* the wife follows the loving leadership of the husband
* the wife is encouraged to express opinions and ideas freely
* the wife's abilities, gifts and talents are employed freely
* Submission does not mean slavery.
* The wife deserves and requires all of the respect, care and dignity of any person.
* Submission is the wife's response to the husband's love. The submission of the wife is closely tied with the love of the husband. The fact is if the husband will not demonstrate unconditional love, the wife will not be inclined to submit.
* Submission is not imposed by the husband.
* The text clearly indicates that the wife initiates the act of submission. The husband's responsibility is to love the wife in a powerful, unconditional manner.
* Submission...the woman's view has a profound impact on her response to violence.
* If a person believes that the violence is justifiable in any way the abuse will continue. The abused person must clearly understand that violence is not a part of submission.
HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD
Some men use "headship" as ammunition for their misuse of power.
*
Head of the household means:
* shouldering responsibility of decisions made
* being accountable for the malfunctions of the family
* taking initiative to correct problems in the family
* listening to the opinions and ideas of the family
* initiating the development of each person in the family
HUSBAND'S EXPRESSING LOVE
"Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church" (Ephesians 5:25)
*
Love is unconditional. The love of Christ is unconditional, therefore the love of a husband for his wife must not express conditions.
*
Love is the focal point of the husband's response to the wife. If the husband begins to focus on controlling the wife instead of loving the wife, he has stepped outside of the design of marriage.
*
Love does not employ:
* physical violence, or the threat of violence
* intimidation or manipulation
"Let us make man in Our image, according to our likeness...and God created man in His own image"
(Genesis 1:26-27)
Man and woman were made in God's image. The image of God is the basis for the dignity, care and respect of all human life. Consequently, there is no basis for developing a "power structure" over another person.
THE REJECTION OF VIOLENCE IN MARRIAGE
"Help me, O Lord from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from the violent man; who purposes to overthrow my life" (Psalms 140:4)
Church Leadership Qualifications = "not violent" (I Tim. 3:3)
Violence has and will be a problem. The Bible states that violence is not an option for church leadership nor should it be a part of the human experience. The use of violence is to "overthrow" another person's life in order to facilitate one's own desires.
SUBMISSION AND THE BIBLE
"Wives be subject to your own husbands" (Ephesians 5:22)
"Husbands love your wives" (Ephesians 5:25)
There are several important points to note from these passages:
* Submission means:
* the wife follows the loving leadership of the husband
* the wife is encouraged to express opinions and ideas freely
* the wife's abilities, gifts and talents are employed freely
* Submission does not mean slavery.
* The wife deserves and requires all of the respect, care and dignity of any person.
* Submission is the wife's response to the husband's love. The submission of the wife is closely tied with the love of the husband. The fact is if the husband will not demonstrate unconditional love, the wife will not be inclined to submit.
* Submission is not imposed by the husband.
* The text clearly indicates that the wife initiates the act of submission. The husband's responsibility is to love the wife in a powerful, unconditional manner.
* Submission...the woman's view has a profound impact on her response to violence.
* If a person believes that the violence is justifiable in any way the abuse will continue. The abused person must clearly understand that violence is not a part of submission.
HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD
Some men use "headship" as ammunition for their misuse of power.
*
Head of the household means:
* shouldering responsibility of decisions made
* being accountable for the malfunctions of the family
* taking initiative to correct problems in the family
* listening to the opinions and ideas of the family
* initiating the development of each person in the family
HUSBAND'S EXPRESSING LOVE
"Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church" (Ephesians 5:25)
*
Love is unconditional. The love of Christ is unconditional, therefore the love of a husband for his wife must not express conditions.
*
Love is the focal point of the husband's response to the wife. If the husband begins to focus on controlling the wife instead of loving the wife, he has stepped outside of the design of marriage.
*
Love does not employ:
* physical violence, or the threat of violence
* intimidation or manipulation
God Speaks Out
Anger and violence are not in God's plan for us.
“A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back.” Proverbs 29:11 NLT
“Keep away from angry, short-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.” Proverbs 22:24-25 NLT
“A hot-tempered person starts fights and gets into all kinds of sin.” Proverbs 29:22 NLT
“Dear friends, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God’s sight.” James 1: 19-20 NLT
“Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but who can survive the destructiveness of jealousy?” Proverbs 27:4 NLT
“A person without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls.” Proverbs 25:28 NLT
“The words of the godly lead to life, evil people cover up their harmful intentions.” Proverbs 10: 11 NLT
“When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results:...hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group,...anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.” Galatians 5:19, 21 NLT
“The Lord examines both the righteous and the wicked. He hates everyone who loves violence.” Psalm 11:5 NLT
“Do not envy a violent man or choose any of his ways.” Proverbs 3:31 NLT
“Give up your violence and oppression and do what is just and right.” Ezekiel 45:9 NLT
Love is what God requires of us. This love does not include violence or abuse.
“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand it’s own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” I Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT
“And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church...In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man is actually loving himself when he loves his wife.” Ephesians 5:25, 28 NLT
“And you husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly.” Colossians 3:19 NLT
God heals those hurts in our lives, taking care of us.
“He heals the brokenhearted, binding up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3 NLT
“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you.” 1 Peter 5:7 NLT
“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 NLT
“God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.” Psalm 46: I NLT
“He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak.” Isaiah 40:29 NLT
“And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows.” Luke 12:7 NLT
What is your biblical response when abuse happens to others?
“All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NLT
“A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need.”
Proverbs 17:17 NLT
“Finally, all of you should be of one mind, full of sympathy toward each other, loving one another with tender hearts and humble minds.”
1 Peter 3:8 NLT
“Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or place to stay.”
1 Peter 4:9 NLT
“Share each other’s troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ.”
Galatians 6:2 NLT
“When God’s children are in need, be the one to help them out. And get into the habit of inviting guests home for dinner or, if they need lodging, for the night.”
Romans 12:13 NLT
“Do for others what you would like them to do for you.”
Matthew 7:1 2a NLT
“A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back.” Proverbs 29:11 NLT
“Keep away from angry, short-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.” Proverbs 22:24-25 NLT
“A hot-tempered person starts fights and gets into all kinds of sin.” Proverbs 29:22 NLT
“Dear friends, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God’s sight.” James 1: 19-20 NLT
“Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but who can survive the destructiveness of jealousy?” Proverbs 27:4 NLT
“A person without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls.” Proverbs 25:28 NLT
“The words of the godly lead to life, evil people cover up their harmful intentions.” Proverbs 10: 11 NLT
“When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results:...hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group,...anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.” Galatians 5:19, 21 NLT
“The Lord examines both the righteous and the wicked. He hates everyone who loves violence.” Psalm 11:5 NLT
“Do not envy a violent man or choose any of his ways.” Proverbs 3:31 NLT
“Give up your violence and oppression and do what is just and right.” Ezekiel 45:9 NLT
Love is what God requires of us. This love does not include violence or abuse.
“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand it’s own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” I Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT
“And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church...In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man is actually loving himself when he loves his wife.” Ephesians 5:25, 28 NLT
“And you husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly.” Colossians 3:19 NLT
God heals those hurts in our lives, taking care of us.
“He heals the brokenhearted, binding up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3 NLT
“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you.” 1 Peter 5:7 NLT
“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 NLT
“God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.” Psalm 46: I NLT
“He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak.” Isaiah 40:29 NLT
“And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows.” Luke 12:7 NLT
What is your biblical response when abuse happens to others?
“All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NLT
“A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need.”
Proverbs 17:17 NLT
“Finally, all of you should be of one mind, full of sympathy toward each other, loving one another with tender hearts and humble minds.”
1 Peter 3:8 NLT
“Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or place to stay.”
1 Peter 4:9 NLT
“Share each other’s troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ.”
Galatians 6:2 NLT
“When God’s children are in need, be the one to help them out. And get into the habit of inviting guests home for dinner or, if they need lodging, for the night.”
Romans 12:13 NLT
“Do for others what you would like them to do for you.”
Matthew 7:1 2a NLT
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Winter
WINTER
by Rhoda
it's been a long, dark winter in my heart
a winter that i thought could never end.
the winter began when i was so young,
it seems like it is all i've ever known.
i don't remember if the winter came all at once,
or if it closed in on me one bruise,
one insult at a time.
the stabbing worlds, the rough hands, seemed to hurt less
from inside the coolness of detachment
inside of ice wall, i hid.
the years slipped by, one after another...
and another.
now the girl is gone and the woman must
choose to hide no longer.
but, oh, how the woman i am grieves the
lost child i was,
the forgotten dreams, the bold hopes.
i am looking forward to the spring,
there is a warmth drawing me, urging me,
to leave the winter, turn away
from the reason for the pain, the terrible cold.
look to the warmth of new hands,
pure eyes, honest caring.
can strength be a facade?
it feels like the strength to endure came
from the ice that grew within.
i feel fragile, vulnerable, hungry for love...
will i find it, will it come for me?
how long before it is spring in my heart,
without the lingering coolness of winter?
i want the spring to turn into warm summer nights,
sultry and passionate.
and most of all. i don't want to be alone,
or the summer will never come.
but there is beauty in spring.
and in spring i can blossom,
explore my essence, ready myself for summer.
so i will leave my winter,
alone.
and become stronger, heal my bruised heart.
i must become whole again,
only then
can i give myself wholly
to the man
that will bring my summer.
Courtesy of Dr. Irene Matiatos and "Rhoda", Copyright© 2000.
www.drirene.com
I Thought...
by Melissa Fralik
Once upon a time, I thought,
He was the soul mate I had sought.
I loved this man, with all my heart,
At last, I believed, a brand new start.
He was so thoughtful, loving, kind.
And always kept my feelings in mind.
I went all out to show my love.
I thanked whoever was up above.
He felt the same, or so I thought.
At first it seemed that's what I got.
But soon his doubts began to creep,
Disturbing peace, and even sleep.
No matter what I said to him,
His view of me was very grim.
Accused of lying and cheating too,
I tried to tell him it wasn't true.
"But all the signs are there", he said.
"Maybe subconsciously in your head
You just aren't aware of what you feel."
But he was wrong; my feelings were real.
Nothing I did was ever enough.
His mood and temper were becoming gruff.
The negative thoughts he had of me
Were real to him but hurtful indeed.
Constantly questioning my thinking and feeling,
Would leave me sinking, my head just reeling.
Someday he will see, I thought.
His fears about me aren't real; they're not.
But soon my denial of his perception
Spawned more fears of my intention.
He began to suspect my goal was control.
By defending my self, I was digging a hole.
He was angry because I said he was wrong
Not realizing he'd done this to me all along.
He controlled my emotions when he was suspicious,
His displays of anger became more malicious.
He wouldn't hurt me, or so I thought.
But in his cycle I was caught.
I was expected to understand
His fears and lend a helping hand.
Yet talking led nowhere, he kept insisting.
My love and devotion he was resisting.
My own self-esteem was really dwindling.
He'd take my defence and use it as kindling.
In anger and resentment my voice would get higher.
Next thing I knew we had a raging fire.
My fault he said, for being defensive,
He was just talking; I was offensive.
Someday he will see, I thought.
He was usually responsible when we fought.
His constant, subtle doubts of me,
The putdowns about my family,
The accusations about my intentions,
And frequent, confusing misperceptions.
My parenting, housekeeping: both in question.
My opinions, feelings, every suggestion
Were reasons for anger, resentment and rage.
I was beginning to feel like I lived in a cage.
He was offensive and I was oppressed.
I cried all the time, became very depressed.
Yet according to him, I was equally bad
For saying mean things when I got mad.
But I am just human and I couldn't take
The one I loved filled with so much hate.
He called me a liar, a cheater too.
And always said I don't know what I do.
"I hate you, don't love you; get out of my life."
"I love you, I'm sorry, please be my wife."
"You never shut up, you're such a bitch,
It's over, I've had it; you blew it you witch."
"I didn't mean it, I'm just so stressed,
I've had a rough life and I'm so depressed."
Yes, I've called him unstable, crazy, psychotic,
Delusional, selfish, controlling, neurotic.
But he choked me while I cried, "I love you, I do"
So maybe in fact my words were true.
Of course I defended myself, who wouldn't?
I loved and trusted, too bad he couldn't.
What I had thought is now long gone.
It's time for me to carry on.
I hope someday that he will see
Exactly what he did to me.
Melissa
Once upon a time, I thought,
He was the soul mate I had sought.
I loved this man, with all my heart,
At last, I believed, a brand new start.
He was so thoughtful, loving, kind.
And always kept my feelings in mind.
I went all out to show my love.
I thanked whoever was up above.
He felt the same, or so I thought.
At first it seemed that's what I got.
But soon his doubts began to creep,
Disturbing peace, and even sleep.
No matter what I said to him,
His view of me was very grim.
Accused of lying and cheating too,
I tried to tell him it wasn't true.
"But all the signs are there", he said.
"Maybe subconsciously in your head
You just aren't aware of what you feel."
But he was wrong; my feelings were real.
Nothing I did was ever enough.
His mood and temper were becoming gruff.
The negative thoughts he had of me
Were real to him but hurtful indeed.
Constantly questioning my thinking and feeling,
Would leave me sinking, my head just reeling.
Someday he will see, I thought.
His fears about me aren't real; they're not.
But soon my denial of his perception
Spawned more fears of my intention.
He began to suspect my goal was control.
By defending my self, I was digging a hole.
He was angry because I said he was wrong
Not realizing he'd done this to me all along.
He controlled my emotions when he was suspicious,
His displays of anger became more malicious.
He wouldn't hurt me, or so I thought.
But in his cycle I was caught.
I was expected to understand
His fears and lend a helping hand.
Yet talking led nowhere, he kept insisting.
My love and devotion he was resisting.
My own self-esteem was really dwindling.
He'd take my defence and use it as kindling.
In anger and resentment my voice would get higher.
Next thing I knew we had a raging fire.
My fault he said, for being defensive,
He was just talking; I was offensive.
Someday he will see, I thought.
He was usually responsible when we fought.
His constant, subtle doubts of me,
The putdowns about my family,
The accusations about my intentions,
And frequent, confusing misperceptions.
My parenting, housekeeping: both in question.
My opinions, feelings, every suggestion
Were reasons for anger, resentment and rage.
I was beginning to feel like I lived in a cage.
He was offensive and I was oppressed.
I cried all the time, became very depressed.
Yet according to him, I was equally bad
For saying mean things when I got mad.
But I am just human and I couldn't take
The one I loved filled with so much hate.
He called me a liar, a cheater too.
And always said I don't know what I do.
"I hate you, don't love you; get out of my life."
"I love you, I'm sorry, please be my wife."
"You never shut up, you're such a bitch,
It's over, I've had it; you blew it you witch."
"I didn't mean it, I'm just so stressed,
I've had a rough life and I'm so depressed."
Yes, I've called him unstable, crazy, psychotic,
Delusional, selfish, controlling, neurotic.
But he choked me while I cried, "I love you, I do"
So maybe in fact my words were true.
Of course I defended myself, who wouldn't?
I loved and trusted, too bad he couldn't.
What I had thought is now long gone.
It's time for me to carry on.
I hope someday that he will see
Exactly what he did to me.
Melissa
Saturday, February 18, 2006
Pushing Against The Rock
There was a man who was asleep one night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light and the Savior appeared. The Lord told the man He had a work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin. The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might. This the man did, day after day. For many years he toiled from sun up to sun down, his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock pushing with all his might. Each night the man returned to his cabin sore and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain. Seeing that the man was showing signs of discouragement, Satan decided to enter the picture placing thoughts into the man's mind such as; "You have been pushing against that rock for a long time and it hasn't budged. Why kill yourself over this? You are never going to move it? etc."
Thus, giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he was a failure.
These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man even more. "Why kill myself over this?" he thought. "I'll just put in my time, giving just the minimum of effort and that will be good enough." And that he planned to do until one day he decided to make it a matter of Prayer and take his troubled thoughts to the Lord.
"Lord" he said, "I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have not even budged that rock a half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?"
To this the Lord responded compassionately, "My friend, when long ago I asked you to serve me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all your strength, which you have done. Never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And now you come to me, your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But, is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your back brown, your hands are callused from constant pressure, and your legs have become massive and hard.
Through opposition you have grown much and your abilities now surpass that which you used to have. Yet you haven't moved the rock.
BUT YOUR CALLING WAS TO BE OBEDIENT, TO PUSH AND TO EXERCISE YOUR FAITH AND TRUST IN MY WISDOM. This you have done. I, my friend, I will now move the rock."
Friday, February 17, 2006
Meanings
Standing for what you believe in,
Regardless of the odds against you,
and the pressure that tears at your resistance,
... means courage.
Keeping a smile on your face,
When inside you feel like dying,
For the sake of supporting others,
... means strength.
Stopping at nothing,
And doing what's in your heart,
You know is right,
... means determination.
Doing more than is expected,
To make another's life a little more bearable,
Without uttering a single complaint,
... means compassion.
Helping a friend in need,
No matter the time or effort,
To the best of your ability,
... means loyalty.
Giving more than you have,
And expecting nothing,
But nothing in return,
... means selflessness.
Holding your head high,
And being the best you know you can be
When life seems to fall apart at your feet,
Facing each difficulty with the confidence
That time will bring you better tomorrows,
And never giving up,
... means confidence.
Lessons From An Oyster
There once was an oyster
Whose story I tell,
Who found that some sand
Had got into his shell.
It was only a grain,
but it gave him great pain.
For oysters have feelings
Although they're so plain.
Now, did he berate
the harsh workings of fate
That had brought him
To such a deplorable state?
Did he curse at the government,
Cry for election,
And claim that the sea should
Have given him protection?
'No,' he said to himself
As he lay on a shell,
Since I cannot remove it,
I shall try to improve it.
Now the years have rolled around,
As the years always do,
And he came to his ultimate
Destiny stew.
And the small grain of sand
That had bothered him so
Was a beautiful pearl
All richly aglow.
Now the tale has a moral,
for isn't it grand
What an oyster can do
With a morsel of sand?
What couldn't we do
If we'd only begin
With some of the things
That get under our skin.
Whose story I tell,
Who found that some sand
Had got into his shell.
It was only a grain,
but it gave him great pain.
For oysters have feelings
Although they're so plain.
Now, did he berate
the harsh workings of fate
That had brought him
To such a deplorable state?
Did he curse at the government,
Cry for election,
And claim that the sea should
Have given him protection?
'No,' he said to himself
As he lay on a shell,
Since I cannot remove it,
I shall try to improve it.
Now the years have rolled around,
As the years always do,
And he came to his ultimate
Destiny stew.
And the small grain of sand
That had bothered him so
Was a beautiful pearl
All richly aglow.
Now the tale has a moral,
for isn't it grand
What an oyster can do
With a morsel of sand?
What couldn't we do
If we'd only begin
With some of the things
That get under our skin.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Anyway
By: Mother Teresa
People are unreasonable, illogical and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
People really need help but may attack you if you help them.
Help people anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
All Things Happen For A Reason
Years ago in Scotland, the Clark family had a dream. Clark and his wife worked and saved, making plans for their nine children and themselves to travel to the United States. It had taken years, but they had finally saved enough money and had gotten passports and reservations for the whole family on a new liner to the United States.
The entire family was filled with anticipation and excitement about their new life. However, seven days before their departure, a dog bit the youngest son. The doctor sewed up the boy but hung a yellow sheet on the Clarks' front door. Because of the possibility of rabies, they were being quarantined for fourteen days.
The family's dreams were dashed. They would not be able to make the trip to America as they had planned. The father, filled with disappointment and anger, stomped to the dock to watch the ship leave - without the Clark family. The father shed tears of disappointment and cursed both his son and God for their misfortune.
Five days later, the tragic news spread throughout Scotland - the mighty Titanic had sunk. The unsinkable ship had sunk, taking hundreds of lives with it. The Clark family was to have been on that ship, but because a dog had bitten the son, they were left behind in Scotland.
When Mr. Clark heard the news, he hugged his son and thanked him for saving the family. He thanked God for saving their lives and turning what he had felt was a tragedy into a blessing.
Although we may not always understand, all things happen for a reason.
The entire family was filled with anticipation and excitement about their new life. However, seven days before their departure, a dog bit the youngest son. The doctor sewed up the boy but hung a yellow sheet on the Clarks' front door. Because of the possibility of rabies, they were being quarantined for fourteen days.
The family's dreams were dashed. They would not be able to make the trip to America as they had planned. The father, filled with disappointment and anger, stomped to the dock to watch the ship leave - without the Clark family. The father shed tears of disappointment and cursed both his son and God for their misfortune.
Five days later, the tragic news spread throughout Scotland - the mighty Titanic had sunk. The unsinkable ship had sunk, taking hundreds of lives with it. The Clark family was to have been on that ship, but because a dog had bitten the son, they were left behind in Scotland.
When Mr. Clark heard the news, he hugged his son and thanked him for saving the family. He thanked God for saving their lives and turning what he had felt was a tragedy into a blessing.
Although we may not always understand, all things happen for a reason.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Are You Abused?
Are You Abused Checklist:
Abuse can take many different forms: verbal, emotional, physical and sexual.
Does your partner. . .
* Belittle or embarrass you in front of others?
* Destroy your possessions?
* Threaten to harm something or someone you care about?
* Try to keep you away from other people?
* Check on you and track all of your time?
* Make you fear for your safety?
* Blame you for the violent behavior?
* Tell you no one else would ever want you?
* Tell you you'll never make it on your own?
* Neglect you when you are sick?
* Become violent in front of your children?
* Threaten to kill himself if you don't do what he wants?
* Push, grab, shove, or choke you?
* Threaten you with a weapon?
* Throw things at you?
* Restrain you?
* Hit you with his fist or an object?
* Force you to have unwanted sex?
* Abuse your children?
* Cause you to need medical treatment?
* Threaten to kill you?
* Cause you visible injuries?
All of the above behaviors are abuse. Once it starts, it will always continue and tends to get worse.
You have the right to be safe!
Abuse can take many different forms: verbal, emotional, physical and sexual.
Does your partner. . .
* Belittle or embarrass you in front of others?
* Destroy your possessions?
* Threaten to harm something or someone you care about?
* Try to keep you away from other people?
* Check on you and track all of your time?
* Make you fear for your safety?
* Blame you for the violent behavior?
* Tell you no one else would ever want you?
* Tell you you'll never make it on your own?
* Neglect you when you are sick?
* Become violent in front of your children?
* Threaten to kill himself if you don't do what he wants?
* Push, grab, shove, or choke you?
* Threaten you with a weapon?
* Throw things at you?
* Restrain you?
* Hit you with his fist or an object?
* Force you to have unwanted sex?
* Abuse your children?
* Cause you to need medical treatment?
* Threaten to kill you?
* Cause you visible injuries?
All of the above behaviors are abuse. Once it starts, it will always continue and tends to get worse.
You have the right to be safe!
The Holy Alphabet
A lthough things are not perfect
B ecause of trial or pain
C ontinue in thanksgiving
D o not begin to blame
E ven when the times are hard
F ierce winds are bound to blow
G od is forever able
H old on to what you know
I magine life without His love
J oy would cease to be
K eep thanking Him for all the things
L ove imparts to thee
M ove out of "Camp Complaining"
N o weapon that is known
O n earth can yield the power
P raise can do alone
Quit looking at the future
R edeem the time at hand
S tart every day with worship
T o "thank" is a command
U ntil we see Him coming
V ictorious in the sky
W e'll run the race with gratitude
X alting God most high
Y es, there'll be good times and yes some will be bad, but...
Z ion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!
I AM Too blessed to be stressed!" The shortest distance between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and floor.
The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. Love and peace be with you forever, Amen.
B ecause of trial or pain
C ontinue in thanksgiving
D o not begin to blame
E ven when the times are hard
F ierce winds are bound to blow
G od is forever able
H old on to what you know
I magine life without His love
J oy would cease to be
K eep thanking Him for all the things
L ove imparts to thee
M ove out of "Camp Complaining"
N o weapon that is known
O n earth can yield the power
P raise can do alone
Quit looking at the future
R edeem the time at hand
S tart every day with worship
T o "thank" is a command
U ntil we see Him coming
V ictorious in the sky
W e'll run the race with gratitude
X alting God most high
Y es, there'll be good times and yes some will be bad, but...
Z ion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!
I AM Too blessed to be stressed!" The shortest distance between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and floor.
The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. Love and peace be with you forever, Amen.
May You Alway Feel Loved
May you find serenity and tranquility in a world
You may not always understand.
May the pain you have known and conflict you have experienced
Give you the strength to walk through life
Facing each new situation with courage and optimism.
Always know that there are those whose love and understanding
Will always be there, even when you feel most alone.
May you discover enough goodness in others
To believe in a world of peace.
May a kind word, a reassuring touch, a warm smile be yours
Every day of your life,
And may you give these gifts as well as receive them.
Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending.
Teach love to those who know hate,
And let that love embrace you as you go into the world.
May the teaching of those you admire become part of you,
So that you may call upon them.
Remember, those whose lives you have touched
And who have touched yours are always a part of you,
Even if the encounters were less than you would have wished.
It is the content of the encounter that is more important than it's
form.
May you not become too concerned with material matters,
But instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart.
Find time in each day to see the beauty and love in the world around
you.
Realize that each person has limitless abilities,
But each of us is different in our own way.
What you may feel you lack in one regard
May be more than compensated for in another.
What you feel you lack in the present
May become one of your strengths in the future.
May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility.
Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience.
May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by
yourself,
And not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments.
May you always feel loved.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
God Said No
I asked God to take away my pain.
God said, No.
It is not for me to take away,
but for you to give it up.
I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.
God said, No.
Her spirit is whole,
her body is only temporary.
I asked God to grant me patience.
God said, No.
Patience is a by-product of tribulations,
it isn't granted, it is earned.
I asked God to give me happiness.
God said, No.
I give you blessings,
Happiness is up to you.
I asked God to spare me suffering.
God said, No.
Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares
and brings you closer to me.
I asked God to make my spirit grow.
God said, No.
You must grow on your own,
but I will prune you to make you fruitful.
I asked for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said, No.
I will give you life so that you may enjoy all things.
I ask God to help me love others, as much as he loves me.
God said...
Ahhhh, finally you have the idea.
Have Courage
When the pressures on and adversity stares you in the face - it's OK to be afraid. You have the courage inside you to rise up to your fears and push forward even if things seem impossible. With courage the impossible can often be overcome. You develop courage by challenging adversity.
"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."
-Theodore Roosevelt
"Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"We could never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world."
-Hellen Keller
"Moral cowardice that keeps us from speaking our minds is as dangerous to this country as irresponsible talk. The right way is not always the popular and easy way. Standing for right when it is unpopular is a true test of moral character."
-Margaret Chase Smith
"When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You can never get enough of what you don't need to make you happy."
-Eric Hoffer
"Courage, it would seem, is nothing less than the power to overcome danger, misfortune, fear, injustice, while continuing to affirm inwardly that life with all its sorrows is good; that everything is meaningful even if in a sense beyond our understanding; and that there is always tomorrow."
-Dorothy Thompson
"The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become."
-Charles Dubois
"Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts."
-Aristotle
"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
-Alan Cohen
"Do the thing you are afraid to do and the death of fear is certain."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time"
-Abraham Lincoln
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult."
-Senaca
"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."
-Theodore Roosevelt
"Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"We could never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world."
-Hellen Keller
"Moral cowardice that keeps us from speaking our minds is as dangerous to this country as irresponsible talk. The right way is not always the popular and easy way. Standing for right when it is unpopular is a true test of moral character."
-Margaret Chase Smith
"When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"You can never get enough of what you don't need to make you happy."
-Eric Hoffer
"Courage, it would seem, is nothing less than the power to overcome danger, misfortune, fear, injustice, while continuing to affirm inwardly that life with all its sorrows is good; that everything is meaningful even if in a sense beyond our understanding; and that there is always tomorrow."
-Dorothy Thompson
"The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become."
-Charles Dubois
"Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts."
-Aristotle
"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
-Alan Cohen
"Do the thing you are afraid to do and the death of fear is certain."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time"
-Abraham Lincoln
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult."
-Senaca
Monday, February 13, 2006
Hang On
"When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn."
- Harriet Beecher Stowe
"They can conquer who believe they can."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"No matter what happens to you, if you can draw strength from God and the people you love, nothing can ever defeat you."
- Reba McEntire
"I know God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much."
- Mother Teresa
"Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another."
- Walter Elliot
"Never give up. Hold on to the ledge, whether it is physical or mental. If you are holding on by sheer willpower, determination and stubbornness, that is enough. Stretch yourself until your fingers bleed, your muscles scream and your breath comes in ragged gasps - and then calm yourself, relax, stretch, take a deep breath. If you can hold on one moment longer, and then one second more, you'll find that the moments become seconds, the seconds add to minutes, and the minutes total to hours, until you've held on long enough to catch your second wind.
Then, with careful confidence, climb upwards until you reach the top."
- Nik Rapelje
Inspirational Tidbits
A woman who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery is an optimist.
***
He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.
***
"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity."
- Joseph Addison
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
***
"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."
- Mark 11:25
***
Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
- Deuteronomy 31:6
***
We wait with patience and submission until God gives us what we request - or something more.
***
"Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up."
- Proverbs 12:25
***
"A smile of encouragement at the right moment may act like sunlight on a closed-up flower; it may be the turning point for a struggling life."
- Unknown
***
When life seems just a dreary grind,
And things seem fated to annoy,
Say something nice to someone else
And watch the world light up with joy.
***
If you think the parade of life is passing you by, perhaps you are not listening to the music.
***
If you are willing to admit faults, you have one less fault to admit.
***
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
***
If you value eternity, make good use of time.
***
Take time to pray - it's a source of power.
Take time to read - it's a fountain of wisdom.
Take time to play - it's a secret of youth.
Take time to be friendly - it's a path to happiness.
Take time to laugh - it's the music of the soul.
Take time to dream - it's a road to greater vision.
Take time to love - it's Godlike.
***
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
***
Find the key to yourself and every door in the world is open to you.
***
"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light within."
- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
***
***
He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.
***
"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity."
- Joseph Addison
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
***
"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."
- Mark 11:25
***
Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
- Deuteronomy 31:6
***
We wait with patience and submission until God gives us what we request - or something more.
***
"Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up."
- Proverbs 12:25
***
"A smile of encouragement at the right moment may act like sunlight on a closed-up flower; it may be the turning point for a struggling life."
- Unknown
***
When life seems just a dreary grind,
And things seem fated to annoy,
Say something nice to someone else
And watch the world light up with joy.
***
If you think the parade of life is passing you by, perhaps you are not listening to the music.
***
If you are willing to admit faults, you have one less fault to admit.
***
If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.
***
If you value eternity, make good use of time.
***
Take time to pray - it's a source of power.
Take time to read - it's a fountain of wisdom.
Take time to play - it's a secret of youth.
Take time to be friendly - it's a path to happiness.
Take time to laugh - it's the music of the soul.
Take time to dream - it's a road to greater vision.
Take time to love - it's Godlike.
***
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
***
Find the key to yourself and every door in the world is open to you.
***
"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light within."
- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
***
How Hope Works
This is how hope works:
It looks for the good in people and situations, rather than finding the worst;
It discovers what can be done instead of throwing up its hands at what can't;
It considers problems large and small, as opportunities to move forward when it would be easier to quit;
It makes us human, helping us find the very best in ourselves for those around us and the situations we face.
- Kevin Eikenberry
It looks for the good in people and situations, rather than finding the worst;
It discovers what can be done instead of throwing up its hands at what can't;
It considers problems large and small, as opportunities to move forward when it would be easier to quit;
It makes us human, helping us find the very best in ourselves for those around us and the situations we face.
- Kevin Eikenberry
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Q & A
Q: What is domestic violence?
A: Domestic violence refers to a pattern of violent and coercive behavior exercised by one adult in an intimate relationship over another. It is not “marital conflict,” “mutual abuse,” “a lovers’ quarrel,” or “a private family matter.” It may consist of repeated, severe beatings or more subtle forms of abuse, including threats and control.
Q: Who are the victims of domestic violence?
A: According to the U.S. Department of Justice, 95% of domestic violence victims in America are women, although men may also be victims. Regardless of who is being victimized, domestic violence is a serious problem that needs to be addressed by religious communities.
Q: How prevalent is domestic violence?
A: Surveys from the U.S. and Canada indicate that domestic violence occurs in 28% of all marriages. Researchers believe this estimate is too low since most domestic violence incidents are unreported.
Q: What are the four basic types of domestic violence?
A: The four basic types of domestic violence are:
Physical Assault
Includes, shoving, pushing, restraining, hitting or kicking. Physical assaults may occur frequently or infrequently, but in many cases they tend to escalate in severity and frequency over time.
Sexual Assault
Any time one partner forces sexual acts that are unwanted or declined by the other partner.
Psychological Assault
Includes isolation from family and friends, forced financial dependence, verbal and emotional abuse, threats, intimidation and control over where the partner can go and what she can do.
Attacks Against Property and Pets
Destruction of property that may include household objects or treasured items belonging to the victim, hitting the walls, or abusing or killing beloved pets.
Q: How do I know if someone is a victim of domestic violence?
A: Among the more obvious signs of domestic violence is evidence of frequent bruises, broken bones and physical attacks. Often less obvious is emotional abuse, as evidenced by harassment, stalking and excessively possessive, controlling or jealous behavior, which are also signs of domestic violence.
Another warning sign is isolation: Victims of domestic violence are often cut off from systems of support by their batterers, becoming distant from friends, relatives or neighbors.
Women who are being battered are as different from each other as non-battered women. They come from all walks of life, all races, all educational backgrounds and all religions. A battered woman might be the vice-president of your local bank, your child’s Sunday school teacher, your beautician or dentist. Anyone experiencing any of the patterns of abuse listed above is a victim of domestic violence.
Q: Why does she stay?
A: She stays because she is terrified that he will become more violent if she leaves, that he will try to take the children, that she can’t make it on her own. He has probably threatened her life.
She may also believe that divorce is wrong, that the violence is her fault, that she can change his behavior, that she can stop the abuse or that the violence is temporary. She may also be experiencing pressure from family, and her religious or cultural community. Since batterers often isolate victims, she might feel cut off from any social support or resources.
Q: Who are batterers?
A: As with their victims, individuals who batter fall into no specific categories. They come from all class backgrounds, races, religions and walks of life. They may be unemployed or highly paid professionals. The batterer may be a good provider, a sober and upstanding member of the community, and a respected member of his congregation.
Q: What can I do to be helpful if an abusive situation is revealed?
Listen to the victim and believe her. Tell her that the abuse is not her fault, and is not God’s will.
Tell her she is not alone and that help is available.
Let her know that without intervention, abuse often escalates in frequency and severity over time.
Seek expert assistance. Refer her only to specialized domestic violence counseling programs, not to couples counseling. Help her find a shelter, a safe home or advocacy resources to offer her protection. Suggesting that she merely return home places her and her children in real danger.
Hold the abuser accountable. Don’t minimize his abusive behavior. Support him in seeking specialized batterers’ counseling to help change his behavior. Continue to hold him accountable and to support and protect the victim even after he has begun a counseling program.
If reconciliation is to occur, it can be considered only after the above steps have taken place.
A: Domestic violence refers to a pattern of violent and coercive behavior exercised by one adult in an intimate relationship over another. It is not “marital conflict,” “mutual abuse,” “a lovers’ quarrel,” or “a private family matter.” It may consist of repeated, severe beatings or more subtle forms of abuse, including threats and control.
Q: Who are the victims of domestic violence?
A: According to the U.S. Department of Justice, 95% of domestic violence victims in America are women, although men may also be victims. Regardless of who is being victimized, domestic violence is a serious problem that needs to be addressed by religious communities.
Q: How prevalent is domestic violence?
A: Surveys from the U.S. and Canada indicate that domestic violence occurs in 28% of all marriages. Researchers believe this estimate is too low since most domestic violence incidents are unreported.
Q: What are the four basic types of domestic violence?
A: The four basic types of domestic violence are:
Physical Assault
Includes, shoving, pushing, restraining, hitting or kicking. Physical assaults may occur frequently or infrequently, but in many cases they tend to escalate in severity and frequency over time.
Sexual Assault
Any time one partner forces sexual acts that are unwanted or declined by the other partner.
Psychological Assault
Includes isolation from family and friends, forced financial dependence, verbal and emotional abuse, threats, intimidation and control over where the partner can go and what she can do.
Attacks Against Property and Pets
Destruction of property that may include household objects or treasured items belonging to the victim, hitting the walls, or abusing or killing beloved pets.
Q: How do I know if someone is a victim of domestic violence?
A: Among the more obvious signs of domestic violence is evidence of frequent bruises, broken bones and physical attacks. Often less obvious is emotional abuse, as evidenced by harassment, stalking and excessively possessive, controlling or jealous behavior, which are also signs of domestic violence.
Another warning sign is isolation: Victims of domestic violence are often cut off from systems of support by their batterers, becoming distant from friends, relatives or neighbors.
Women who are being battered are as different from each other as non-battered women. They come from all walks of life, all races, all educational backgrounds and all religions. A battered woman might be the vice-president of your local bank, your child’s Sunday school teacher, your beautician or dentist. Anyone experiencing any of the patterns of abuse listed above is a victim of domestic violence.
Q: Why does she stay?
A: She stays because she is terrified that he will become more violent if she leaves, that he will try to take the children, that she can’t make it on her own. He has probably threatened her life.
She may also believe that divorce is wrong, that the violence is her fault, that she can change his behavior, that she can stop the abuse or that the violence is temporary. She may also be experiencing pressure from family, and her religious or cultural community. Since batterers often isolate victims, she might feel cut off from any social support or resources.
Q: Who are batterers?
A: As with their victims, individuals who batter fall into no specific categories. They come from all class backgrounds, races, religions and walks of life. They may be unemployed or highly paid professionals. The batterer may be a good provider, a sober and upstanding member of the community, and a respected member of his congregation.
Q: What can I do to be helpful if an abusive situation is revealed?
Listen to the victim and believe her. Tell her that the abuse is not her fault, and is not God’s will.
Tell her she is not alone and that help is available.
Let her know that without intervention, abuse often escalates in frequency and severity over time.
Seek expert assistance. Refer her only to specialized domestic violence counseling programs, not to couples counseling. Help her find a shelter, a safe home or advocacy resources to offer her protection. Suggesting that she merely return home places her and her children in real danger.
Hold the abuser accountable. Don’t minimize his abusive behavior. Support him in seeking specialized batterers’ counseling to help change his behavior. Continue to hold him accountable and to support and protect the victim even after he has begun a counseling program.
If reconciliation is to occur, it can be considered only after the above steps have taken place.
Is Your Hut Burning?
The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him from the elements, and to store his few possessions.
Then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger. "God, how could you do this to me!" he cried.
Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. "How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers. "We saw your smoke signal," they replied.
It is easy to get discouraged when things are going bad. But we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering.
Remember, next time your little hut is burning to the ground----it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God. For all the negative things we have to say to ourselves, God has a positive answer for it:
You say: "It's impossible."
God says: All things are possible (Luke 18:27)
You say: "I'm too tired."
God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: "Nobody really loves me."
God says: I love you (John 3:16 & John 13:34)
You say: "I can't go on."
God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalms 91:15)
You say: "I can't figure things out."
God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6)
You say: "I can't do it."
God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)
You say: "I'm not able."
God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: "It's not worth it."
God says: It will be worth it (Roman 8:28)
You say: "I can't forgive myself."
God says: I FORGIVE YOU (I John 1:9& Romans 8:1)
You say: "I can't manage."
God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)
You say: "I'm afraid."
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)
You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated."
God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)
You say: "I don't have enough faith."
God says: I've given everyone a measure of faith (Romans 12:3)
You say: "I'm not smart enough."
God says: I give you wisdom (I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: "I feel all alone."
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)
Then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger. "God, how could you do this to me!" he cried.
Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. "How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers. "We saw your smoke signal," they replied.
It is easy to get discouraged when things are going bad. But we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering.
Remember, next time your little hut is burning to the ground----it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God. For all the negative things we have to say to ourselves, God has a positive answer for it:
You say: "It's impossible."
God says: All things are possible (Luke 18:27)
You say: "I'm too tired."
God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: "Nobody really loves me."
God says: I love you (John 3:16 & John 13:34)
You say: "I can't go on."
God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalms 91:15)
You say: "I can't figure things out."
God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6)
You say: "I can't do it."
God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)
You say: "I'm not able."
God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: "It's not worth it."
God says: It will be worth it (Roman 8:28)
You say: "I can't forgive myself."
God says: I FORGIVE YOU (I John 1:9& Romans 8:1)
You say: "I can't manage."
God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)
You say: "I'm afraid."
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)
You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated."
God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)
You say: "I don't have enough faith."
God says: I've given everyone a measure of faith (Romans 12:3)
You say: "I'm not smart enough."
God says: I give you wisdom (I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: "I feel all alone."
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)
The Truth About Verbal Abuse
Julie* fell in love with Scott* at first sight. It happened at the bus stop when she was 16 on her way back from her first day at college. She’d sprained her ankle and a friend was half-supporting, half-carrying her. Despite the pain she couldn’t help but notice the good looking guy waiting at the bus stop. Scott looked at her and his first words to her were that she was ‘a drunken c**t’. Julie thought that was hilarious.
By the time she got off the bus they had exchanged phone numbers. They started dating and within weeks had decided they were each other’s perfect partner. They soon got engaged. The relationship was passionate, tempestuous with tremendous highs and lows.
5 years on, Julie and Scott are still together and Julie’s confidence is shot to pieces. Scott still tells her he loves her, occasionally, but spends a lot more time telling her how stupid, lazy, ugly and fat she is. (These days he doesn’t limit himself to harsh words.)
Of course, he also tells her how lucky she is to have someone like him, because nobody else would want her. The sad thing is, she believes him totally. She’s been so brainwashed by him for so long….
We live in a society that is preoccupied with political correctness on the one hand, and preoccupied with minimizing or denying domestic abuse and violence on the other. Especially in the absence of recorded physical violence.
“If it doesn’t leave a physical mark it doesn’t count as violence”, seems to be the crude criterion. This is of course a nonsense.
Then there is the tendency to categorize non-physical violence as ‘emotional abuse’, ‘mental abuse’ and ‘verbal abuse’ as if there were any significant difference; and as if any of them were negligeable.
Verbal abuse is, correctly speaking, verbal violence. Words, if spoken by someone whose opinion of you, you care about, can shatter you into a thousand pieces.
Had Hitler not used words so effectively in the first place he would never have won support and never have come to power. Hitler was a past-master of verbal violence. All too often, verbal violence escalates into physical violence.
Emotional abuse, correctly speaking, is emotional violence. The difference between verbal and emotional abuse or violence is illusory. Maybe verbal abuse sounds less destructive, but it still works through emotional brainwashing and brutality. Telling someone who loves you that they disgust you, repeatedly, will devastate them psychologically.
Mental abuse, correctly speaking is mental violence. All verbal, emotional and physical violence is also mental abuse, given its psychological impact on us. Mental abuse occurs whenever one person in a relationship attempts to gain unconditional power and control over the other person.
Nobody should lose years, or even months, of their life in the misery, humiliation and fear of an abusive relationship. If often starts when someone says mean things about you and won’t stop, even when you ask them not to, because it’s upsetting you. That is abusive. That person is giving you a clear sign that they don’t care about your feelings – no matter what excuse they make later.
An abuser acts as if he/she has a licence to hurt the other person. Each time you accept it and give him/her, or the relationship, another chance, you are endorsing his/her right to hurt you. You cannot help another person to change. You cannot change them by offering them the love they never had. You can only tear yourself into bite-sized chunks of raw flesh that they will devour whenever they feel hungry.
It pays to listen very carefully, right from the start, to the words that the other person speaks. Maybe, like Scott they are dismissive of you; maybe they put you on a pedestal and run down almost everyone else they know. If you’re feeling bad about yourself, a pedestal has its attractions. But a pedestal offers no guarantees and no protection at all.
Predators always revert to type. They feed on raw meat. Abusers are predators, whether the violence they use is verbal, emotional, mental or physical.
*not their real names
-By Annie Kaszina
Joyfulcoaching.com
By the time she got off the bus they had exchanged phone numbers. They started dating and within weeks had decided they were each other’s perfect partner. They soon got engaged. The relationship was passionate, tempestuous with tremendous highs and lows.
5 years on, Julie and Scott are still together and Julie’s confidence is shot to pieces. Scott still tells her he loves her, occasionally, but spends a lot more time telling her how stupid, lazy, ugly and fat she is. (These days he doesn’t limit himself to harsh words.)
Of course, he also tells her how lucky she is to have someone like him, because nobody else would want her. The sad thing is, she believes him totally. She’s been so brainwashed by him for so long….
We live in a society that is preoccupied with political correctness on the one hand, and preoccupied with minimizing or denying domestic abuse and violence on the other. Especially in the absence of recorded physical violence.
“If it doesn’t leave a physical mark it doesn’t count as violence”, seems to be the crude criterion. This is of course a nonsense.
Then there is the tendency to categorize non-physical violence as ‘emotional abuse’, ‘mental abuse’ and ‘verbal abuse’ as if there were any significant difference; and as if any of them were negligeable.
Verbal abuse is, correctly speaking, verbal violence. Words, if spoken by someone whose opinion of you, you care about, can shatter you into a thousand pieces.
Had Hitler not used words so effectively in the first place he would never have won support and never have come to power. Hitler was a past-master of verbal violence. All too often, verbal violence escalates into physical violence.
Emotional abuse, correctly speaking, is emotional violence. The difference between verbal and emotional abuse or violence is illusory. Maybe verbal abuse sounds less destructive, but it still works through emotional brainwashing and brutality. Telling someone who loves you that they disgust you, repeatedly, will devastate them psychologically.
Mental abuse, correctly speaking is mental violence. All verbal, emotional and physical violence is also mental abuse, given its psychological impact on us. Mental abuse occurs whenever one person in a relationship attempts to gain unconditional power and control over the other person.
Nobody should lose years, or even months, of their life in the misery, humiliation and fear of an abusive relationship. If often starts when someone says mean things about you and won’t stop, even when you ask them not to, because it’s upsetting you. That is abusive. That person is giving you a clear sign that they don’t care about your feelings – no matter what excuse they make later.
An abuser acts as if he/she has a licence to hurt the other person. Each time you accept it and give him/her, or the relationship, another chance, you are endorsing his/her right to hurt you. You cannot help another person to change. You cannot change them by offering them the love they never had. You can only tear yourself into bite-sized chunks of raw flesh that they will devour whenever they feel hungry.
It pays to listen very carefully, right from the start, to the words that the other person speaks. Maybe, like Scott they are dismissive of you; maybe they put you on a pedestal and run down almost everyone else they know. If you’re feeling bad about yourself, a pedestal has its attractions. But a pedestal offers no guarantees and no protection at all.
Predators always revert to type. They feed on raw meat. Abusers are predators, whether the violence they use is verbal, emotional, mental or physical.
*not their real names
-By Annie Kaszina
Joyfulcoaching.com
Friday, February 10, 2006
Trials
You perhaps recall the story of the blacksmith who gave his heart to God. Though conscientious in his living, still he was not prospering materially. In fact, it seems that from the time of his conversion more trouble, affliction and loss were sustained than ever before. Everything seemed to be going wrong.
One day a friend who was not a Christian stopped at the little gorge to talk to him. Sympathizing with him in some of his trials, the friend said "It seems strange to me that so much affliction should pass over you just at the time when you have become an earnest Christian. Of course, I don't want to weaken your faith in God or anything like that. But here you are, God's help and guidance, and yet things seem to be getting steadily worse. I can't help wondering why it is."
The blacksmith did not answer immediately, and it was evident that he had thought the same question before. But finally, he said "You see here the raw iron which I have to make into horse's shoes. You know what I do with it? I take a piece and heat it in the fire until it is red, almost white with the heat. Then I hammer it unmercifully to shape it as I know it should be shaped. Then I plunge it into a pail of cold water to temper it. Then I heat it again and hammer it some more. And this I do until it is finished."
"But, sometimes I find a piece of iron that won't stand up under this treatment. The heat and the hammering and the cold water are too much for it. I don't know why it fails in the process, but I know it will never make a good horse's shoe."
He pointed to a heap of scrap iron that was near the door of his shop. "When I get a piece that cannot take the shape and temper, I throw it out on the scrap heap. It will never be good for anything." He went on, "I know that God has been holding me in the fires of affliction and I have felt His hammer upon me. But I don't mind, if only He can bring me to what I should be.
And so, in all these hard things my prayer is simply this: Try me in any way you wish, Lord, only don't throw me into the scrap heap."
One day a friend who was not a Christian stopped at the little gorge to talk to him. Sympathizing with him in some of his trials, the friend said "It seems strange to me that so much affliction should pass over you just at the time when you have become an earnest Christian. Of course, I don't want to weaken your faith in God or anything like that. But here you are, God's help and guidance, and yet things seem to be getting steadily worse. I can't help wondering why it is."
The blacksmith did not answer immediately, and it was evident that he had thought the same question before. But finally, he said "You see here the raw iron which I have to make into horse's shoes. You know what I do with it? I take a piece and heat it in the fire until it is red, almost white with the heat. Then I hammer it unmercifully to shape it as I know it should be shaped. Then I plunge it into a pail of cold water to temper it. Then I heat it again and hammer it some more. And this I do until it is finished."
"But, sometimes I find a piece of iron that won't stand up under this treatment. The heat and the hammering and the cold water are too much for it. I don't know why it fails in the process, but I know it will never make a good horse's shoe."
He pointed to a heap of scrap iron that was near the door of his shop. "When I get a piece that cannot take the shape and temper, I throw it out on the scrap heap. It will never be good for anything." He went on, "I know that God has been holding me in the fires of affliction and I have felt His hammer upon me. But I don't mind, if only He can bring me to what I should be.
And so, in all these hard things my prayer is simply this: Try me in any way you wish, Lord, only don't throw me into the scrap heap."
Thursday, February 09, 2006
From God, To Women
Dear Women,
When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils.
But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you. Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity.
From one bone, I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do.
Around this one bone, I shaped you... I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully. Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile.
You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body.
You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.
You are My perfect angel..... You are My beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and My eyes fill when I see the virtues in your heart.
Your eyes... don't change them.
Your lips, how lovely they part in prayer.
Your nose, so perfect in form.
Your hands, so gentle to touch.
I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep.
I've held your heart close to Mine.
Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like Me.
Adam walked the earth with Me in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely. He could not see Me or touch Me. He could only feel Me.
I fashioned in you; My holiness, My strength, My purity, My love, My protection and support. You are special because you are an extension of Me.
Man represents My image, woman My emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.
I love you, my most precious woman!
GOD
When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils.
But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you. Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity.
From one bone, I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do.
Around this one bone, I shaped you... I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully. Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile.
You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body.
You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.
You are My perfect angel..... You are My beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and My eyes fill when I see the virtues in your heart.
Your eyes... don't change them.
Your lips, how lovely they part in prayer.
Your nose, so perfect in form.
Your hands, so gentle to touch.
I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep.
I've held your heart close to Mine.
Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like Me.
Adam walked the earth with Me in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely. He could not see Me or touch Me. He could only feel Me.
I fashioned in you; My holiness, My strength, My purity, My love, My protection and support. You are special because you are an extension of Me.
Man represents My image, woman My emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.
I love you, my most precious woman!
GOD
Food For Thought
If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following:
There would be:
57 Asians
21 Europeans
14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south
8 Africans
52 would be female
48 would be male
70 would be nonwhite
30 would be white
70 would be non-Christian
30 would be Christian
89 would be heterosexual
11 would be homosexual
6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth, and all 6 would be from the United States.
80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
1 would be near death; 1 would be near birth
1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education
1 would own a computer
When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes glaringly apparent.
The following is also something to ponder...
If you woke up this morning with more health than illness... you are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.
If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation ... you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.
If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death...you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.
If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep...you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace... you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
If your parents are still alive and still married... you are very rare, even in the United States and Canada.
If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you, and furthermore, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.
There would be:
57 Asians
21 Europeans
14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south
8 Africans
52 would be female
48 would be male
70 would be nonwhite
30 would be white
70 would be non-Christian
30 would be Christian
89 would be heterosexual
11 would be homosexual
6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth, and all 6 would be from the United States.
80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
1 would be near death; 1 would be near birth
1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education
1 would own a computer
When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes glaringly apparent.
The following is also something to ponder...
If you woke up this morning with more health than illness... you are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.
If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation ... you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.
If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death...you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.
If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep...you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace... you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
If your parents are still alive and still married... you are very rare, even in the United States and Canada.
If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you, and furthermore, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Women Over 30
Here is a piece written by Andy Rooney - CBS 60 Minutes.
As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.
A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing.
Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.
Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over
30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They always know. A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than
her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest.
They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one!
You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize.
Andy Rooney
As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.
A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing.
Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.
Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over
30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They always know. A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than
her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest.
They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one!
You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize.
Andy Rooney
How To Be Happy
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Why Sit Here Until I Die?
By Audrina Jones Bunton
The Bible tells a story about four men who sat at the entrance of the
city's gate dying with leprosy, an incurable disease which causes
terribly visible swelling and sores on the skin, only then to eat inward to
the bones. Because of this contagious and incurable disease, these
lepers sat outside of the city because they were not permitted to live
within the city. These men were faced with a fatal disease, were outcasts,
and were starving because of a feminine in the land. Such a hopeless
life and no perceived future, would make the average person throw in the
towel and just give up on life -- but not these men.
Sitting and examining their situation, they realized that just simply
sitting and doing nothing would result in having and being nothing, so
they asked themselves the question, "Why do we sit here until we die?"
They knew that if they entered the city, they would die because of the
feminine. They also knew that if they sat there and did nothing, that
they would die. What did they do? They made the decision to ACT.
Regardless of their gloomy circumstance, they got up from were they
were and decided to do something to change their situation. They made the
choice to face their obstacles and do something different. They went
into the city realizing that difficulties may be ahead, for if the city
dwellers spared their lives, they would live -- and if not, they would
die. Given the situation that they were in, things were not going to
just get better.
Upon entering the city, to their pleasant surprise, no one was there,
because God had caused the city dwellers to abandon their tents.
Because of their decision to change their situation, and the decision
to act, these hungry dying men when into a tent, and feasted as they
ate, drank, and carried off silver, gold, and clothing. However, things
did not end there, because after putting away the silver, gold, and
clothing -- they entered another tent and again met great fortune.
Just like these lepers, you may be in your decision place today. If you
are in a place, or situation that seems lifeless -- regardless of where
that place may be, or how things look -- ask yourself the question,
"Why do I sit here until I die?"
Take a good look at where you are, and where you want to be -- then
take the necessary steps to find yourself in that desired place.
In the midst of misfortune, choice -- and then action -- will find you
reaping the great benefits that God has purposed for your life.
Copyright 2002 by Audrina Jones Bunton.
The Bible tells a story about four men who sat at the entrance of the
city's gate dying with leprosy, an incurable disease which causes
terribly visible swelling and sores on the skin, only then to eat inward to
the bones. Because of this contagious and incurable disease, these
lepers sat outside of the city because they were not permitted to live
within the city. These men were faced with a fatal disease, were outcasts,
and were starving because of a feminine in the land. Such a hopeless
life and no perceived future, would make the average person throw in the
towel and just give up on life -- but not these men.
Sitting and examining their situation, they realized that just simply
sitting and doing nothing would result in having and being nothing, so
they asked themselves the question, "Why do we sit here until we die?"
They knew that if they entered the city, they would die because of the
feminine. They also knew that if they sat there and did nothing, that
they would die. What did they do? They made the decision to ACT.
Regardless of their gloomy circumstance, they got up from were they
were and decided to do something to change their situation. They made the
choice to face their obstacles and do something different. They went
into the city realizing that difficulties may be ahead, for if the city
dwellers spared their lives, they would live -- and if not, they would
die. Given the situation that they were in, things were not going to
just get better.
Upon entering the city, to their pleasant surprise, no one was there,
because God had caused the city dwellers to abandon their tents.
Because of their decision to change their situation, and the decision
to act, these hungry dying men when into a tent, and feasted as they
ate, drank, and carried off silver, gold, and clothing. However, things
did not end there, because after putting away the silver, gold, and
clothing -- they entered another tent and again met great fortune.
Just like these lepers, you may be in your decision place today. If you
are in a place, or situation that seems lifeless -- regardless of where
that place may be, or how things look -- ask yourself the question,
"Why do I sit here until I die?"
Take a good look at where you are, and where you want to be -- then
take the necessary steps to find yourself in that desired place.
In the midst of misfortune, choice -- and then action -- will find you
reaping the great benefits that God has purposed for your life.
Copyright 2002 by Audrina Jones Bunton.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
While You Are Reading This:
1. Somebody is very proud of you.
2. Somebody is thinking of you.
3. Somebody is caring about you.
4. Somebody misses you.
5. Somebody wants to talk to you.
6. Somebody wants to be with you.
7. Somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
8. Somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
9. Somebody wants to hold your hand.
10. Somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
11. Somebody wants you to be happy.
12. Somebody is celebrating your successes.
13. Somebody wants to give you a gift.
14. Somebody thinks that you are a gift.
15. Somebody hopes you are not too cold.
16. Somebody hopes you are not too hot.
17. Somebody wants to hug you.
18. Somebody loves you.
19. Somebody admires your strength.
20. Sombody is thinking of you and smiling.
21. Somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on.
22. Somebody wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun.
23. Somebody thinks the world of you.
24. Somebody wants to protect you.
25. Somebody would do anything for you.
26. Somebody wants to be forgiven by you.
27. Somebody is grateful for your forgiveness.
28. Somebody wants to laugh with you.
29. Somebody remembers you and wishes that you were there.
30. Somebody is praising God for you.
31. Somebody needs to know that your love for them is unconditional.
32. Somebody values your advice.
33. Somebody wants to tell you how much they care.
34. Somebody wants to share their dreams with you.
35. Somebody wants to hold you in their arms.
36. Somebody wants you to hold them in your arms.
37. Somebody treasures your spirit.
38. Somebody wishes they could stop time because of you.
39. Somebody praises God for your friendship and love.
40. Somebody can't wait to see you again.
41. Somebody loves you for who you are.
42. Somebody loves the way you make them feel.
43. Somebody wants to be with you (forever and ever).
44. Somebody wants you to know they are there for you (always).
45. Somebody is glad that you're their friend.
46. Somebody wants to be your friend.
47. Somebody stayed up all night thinking about you.
48. Somebody is alive because of you.
49. Somebody is wishing that you noticed them.
50. Somebody wants to get to know you better.
51. Somebody wants to be near you.
52. Somebody misses your advice and guidance.
53. Somebody has faith in you.
54. Somebody trusts you...a lot.
55. Somebody needs your support.
56. Somebody needs you to have faith in them.
57. Somebody needs you to let them be your friend.
58. Somebody hears a song that reminds them of you.
59. Somebody wishes they could tell you how they feel.
60. Somebody wishes you would feel the same.
2. Somebody is thinking of you.
3. Somebody is caring about you.
4. Somebody misses you.
5. Somebody wants to talk to you.
6. Somebody wants to be with you.
7. Somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
8. Somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
9. Somebody wants to hold your hand.
10. Somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
11. Somebody wants you to be happy.
12. Somebody is celebrating your successes.
13. Somebody wants to give you a gift.
14. Somebody thinks that you are a gift.
15. Somebody hopes you are not too cold.
16. Somebody hopes you are not too hot.
17. Somebody wants to hug you.
18. Somebody loves you.
19. Somebody admires your strength.
20. Sombody is thinking of you and smiling.
21. Somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on.
22. Somebody wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun.
23. Somebody thinks the world of you.
24. Somebody wants to protect you.
25. Somebody would do anything for you.
26. Somebody wants to be forgiven by you.
27. Somebody is grateful for your forgiveness.
28. Somebody wants to laugh with you.
29. Somebody remembers you and wishes that you were there.
30. Somebody is praising God for you.
31. Somebody needs to know that your love for them is unconditional.
32. Somebody values your advice.
33. Somebody wants to tell you how much they care.
34. Somebody wants to share their dreams with you.
35. Somebody wants to hold you in their arms.
36. Somebody wants you to hold them in your arms.
37. Somebody treasures your spirit.
38. Somebody wishes they could stop time because of you.
39. Somebody praises God for your friendship and love.
40. Somebody can't wait to see you again.
41. Somebody loves you for who you are.
42. Somebody loves the way you make them feel.
43. Somebody wants to be with you (forever and ever).
44. Somebody wants you to know they are there for you (always).
45. Somebody is glad that you're their friend.
46. Somebody wants to be your friend.
47. Somebody stayed up all night thinking about you.
48. Somebody is alive because of you.
49. Somebody is wishing that you noticed them.
50. Somebody wants to get to know you better.
51. Somebody wants to be near you.
52. Somebody misses your advice and guidance.
53. Somebody has faith in you.
54. Somebody trusts you...a lot.
55. Somebody needs your support.
56. Somebody needs you to have faith in them.
57. Somebody needs you to let them be your friend.
58. Somebody hears a song that reminds them of you.
59. Somebody wishes they could tell you how they feel.
60. Somebody wishes you would feel the same.
Fear
"Fear is a woman's worst enemy. Fear serves to paralyze women, holds us in place, saps our energy and attention from important work, and limits our creativity and imagination. Fear keeps us close to home. It silences us. And if we wait until we are unafraid, fixed, or analyzed, we may have waited too long."
-Harriet Goldhor-Lerner
Faith
Sometimes I'm sad. I know not why
My heart is sore distressed.
It seems the burdens of this world
Have settled on my heart.
And yet I know...I know that God
Who doeth all things right
Will lead me thus to understand
to walk by faith...not sight.
And though I may not see the way
He's planned for me to go...
That way seems dark to me just now
But oh, I'm sure He knows!
Today He guides my feeble step
Tomorrow's in His right...
He has asked me to never fear...
But walk by faith...not sight.
Some day the mists will roll away,
The sun will shine again.
I'll see the beauty in the flowers.
I'll hear the bird's refrain.
And then I'll know my Father's hand
Has led the way to light
Because I placed my hand in His
And walked by faith...not sight.
-Ruth A. Morgan
My heart is sore distressed.
It seems the burdens of this world
Have settled on my heart.
And yet I know...I know that God
Who doeth all things right
Will lead me thus to understand
to walk by faith...not sight.
And though I may not see the way
He's planned for me to go...
That way seems dark to me just now
But oh, I'm sure He knows!
Today He guides my feeble step
Tomorrow's in His right...
He has asked me to never fear...
But walk by faith...not sight.
Some day the mists will roll away,
The sun will shine again.
I'll see the beauty in the flowers.
I'll hear the bird's refrain.
And then I'll know my Father's hand
Has led the way to light
Because I placed my hand in His
And walked by faith...not sight.
-Ruth A. Morgan
Angels Watching Over You
Sometimes the Lord calms the storm; sometimes He
lets the storm rage and calms His child.
Monday, February 06, 2006
In The Company Of Violence
Every business is at risk...it's your company problem too:
-According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, companies lose $8.3 billion a year in liability and healthcare costs, lost productivity and absenteeism related to intimate partner domestic violence.
-Domestic violence is one of the top three causes of death for women at work, far exceeding accidents, and its occurence is on the rise. -Tim Dimoff President, Sacs Consulting
-Women lose 8 million paid workdays, the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs, as a result of domestic violence. Companies forfeit $900 million a year in lost productivity. - U.S. Dept. Of Health and Human Services
-71% of human resource managers on one survey have reported a domestic violence incident at work.
-94% of corporate security directors say domestic violence is a serious problem on the job site. -Corporate Alliance To End Partner Violence
Help be part of the solution, not the problem. Support women trying to make it on their own, not fire them. They need jobs so they can be able to support themselves and their children away from the abuse.
***Based on an article in the Feb/Mar 2006 issue of Pink Magazine...www.pinkmagazine.com
-According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, companies lose $8.3 billion a year in liability and healthcare costs, lost productivity and absenteeism related to intimate partner domestic violence.
-Domestic violence is one of the top three causes of death for women at work, far exceeding accidents, and its occurence is on the rise. -Tim Dimoff President, Sacs Consulting
-Women lose 8 million paid workdays, the equivalent of 32,000 full-time jobs, as a result of domestic violence. Companies forfeit $900 million a year in lost productivity. - U.S. Dept. Of Health and Human Services
-71% of human resource managers on one survey have reported a domestic violence incident at work.
-94% of corporate security directors say domestic violence is a serious problem on the job site. -Corporate Alliance To End Partner Violence
Help be part of the solution, not the problem. Support women trying to make it on their own, not fire them. They need jobs so they can be able to support themselves and their children away from the abuse.
***Based on an article in the Feb/Mar 2006 issue of Pink Magazine...www.pinkmagazine.com
Did You Know
-Thomas Edison, who created the lightbulb, was partially deaf and never completed grade school.
-Einstein couldn't speak fluently when he was nine. His parents thought he might be retarded.
-In high school, Robin Williams was voted "Least Likely To Succeed."
****So remember, the biggest successes are usually failures in disguise. Don't give up.
-Einstein couldn't speak fluently when he was nine. His parents thought he might be retarded.
-In high school, Robin Williams was voted "Least Likely To Succeed."
****So remember, the biggest successes are usually failures in disguise. Don't give up.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
I Am Good Enough
In an unconditional relationship you are loved for yourself. You may burn the dinner, scratch the car, put on weight, say something you may regret, but you remain lovable and loved. You are, quite simply, good enough.
In a conditional relationship, you learn the things that provoke the person whose love you crave. You become extraordinarily talented at keeping the 100 Laws of the acceptable behaviour.
There is a law for every possible situation and you make it your business not to infringe any one of them. You expend enormous emotional energy picking your way through the 100 Laws as carefully as you would a minefield. You may even congratulate yourself, briefly, on how well you are doing. And then, BANG, Law 101 - the one nobody told you about.
The thing is, there always will be another law, because the underlying principle is that you are being set up to mess up. This justifies the lawmaker taking his fury out on you. (That's how the lawmaker gets to feel good about himself.)
In the fairy tale, everything turned out happily ever after for Cinderella - allegedly - when the Prince rescued her. (Either that or she didn't care to admit publicly that she was a sucker for Charming's delightful public face.)
In the case of our 21st century Cinderella, well, she's coming around to the idea that a Rescuer is only an abuser on a white horse. Things will turn out happily for her once she starts to rescue herself.
The best way of doing that is replacing the 100 Laws with her own simplified Constitution, which reads: "I am good enough." Period.
In a conditional relationship, you learn the things that provoke the person whose love you crave. You become extraordinarily talented at keeping the 100 Laws of the acceptable behaviour.
There is a law for every possible situation and you make it your business not to infringe any one of them. You expend enormous emotional energy picking your way through the 100 Laws as carefully as you would a minefield. You may even congratulate yourself, briefly, on how well you are doing. And then, BANG, Law 101 - the one nobody told you about.
The thing is, there always will be another law, because the underlying principle is that you are being set up to mess up. This justifies the lawmaker taking his fury out on you. (That's how the lawmaker gets to feel good about himself.)
In the fairy tale, everything turned out happily ever after for Cinderella - allegedly - when the Prince rescued her. (Either that or she didn't care to admit publicly that she was a sucker for Charming's delightful public face.)
In the case of our 21st century Cinderella, well, she's coming around to the idea that a Rescuer is only an abuser on a white horse. Things will turn out happily for her once she starts to rescue herself.
The best way of doing that is replacing the 100 Laws with her own simplified Constitution, which reads: "I am good enough." Period.
Friday, February 03, 2006
Atitude
Give each letter of the alphabet a number,
a=1, b=2, etc. If you add up the letters of the
alphabet in the word "Attitude," this is the result:
A = 1
T = 20
T = 20
I = 9
T = 20
U = 21
D = 4
E = 5
100
Attitude is 100%.
a=1, b=2, etc. If you add up the letters of the
alphabet in the word "Attitude," this is the result:
A = 1
T = 20
T = 20
I = 9
T = 20
U = 21
D = 4
E = 5
100
Attitude is 100%.
Three Wise Women
Three Wise Women
Would Have...
Asked directions,
Arrived on time,
Helped deliver the baby,
Cleaned the stable,
Made a casserole,
Brought practical gifts,
And...
There would be peace on earth.
Would Have...
Asked directions,
Arrived on time,
Helped deliver the baby,
Cleaned the stable,
Made a casserole,
Brought practical gifts,
And...
There would be peace on earth.
Keep Her Happy
"Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First is to let her think she's having her own way. Second is to let her have it." -Lady Bird Johnson
Men Jokes
-He said, "Since I first laid eyes on you, I have wanted to make love to you really badly." She said, "Well, you succeeded."
-"It's too hot to wear clothes today," he said as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-He said, "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?" She said, "Turn sideways and look in the mirror."
-Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-"It's too hot to wear clothes today," he said as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-He said, "What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?" She said, "Turn sideways and look in the mirror."
-Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
About Love...
-Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them.
-Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear.
-Looking for love before developing a strong sense of self is like trying to find the mate of a shoe you've never seen.
-The door of love won't open unless you do some pushing.
-People who really love you will not want you to be afraid of them.
-Every minute spent angry is sixty seconds of love wasted.
-Learn to love your own company. You are the one person you can count on living with for the rest of your life.
-GOD LOVES ABUSED WOMEN TOO!
-Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear.
-Looking for love before developing a strong sense of self is like trying to find the mate of a shoe you've never seen.
-The door of love won't open unless you do some pushing.
-People who really love you will not want you to be afraid of them.
-Every minute spent angry is sixty seconds of love wasted.
-Learn to love your own company. You are the one person you can count on living with for the rest of your life.
-GOD LOVES ABUSED WOMEN TOO!
Thursday, February 02, 2006
Keep Reading, Dear...
My husband always threw in my face the Bible verse that says, "Wives, submit to your husbands." I guess he forgot about this Bible verse.
Don't Try To Do It All Yourself
Now, my math is basic, but I still know that 100% is as much as there is. That goes for relationships too-and it's an important point: in relationships, all there is, is 100%.
In an abusive relationship, the abused partner ends up putting more and more love and care etc. into the relationship as the abuser puts in progressively less.
Now, an abused woman thinks if she keeps putting in 100%, the day will come when she will be met with the same 100%. Except she won't. Because that would make 200%.
In an abusive relationship, the abused partner ends up putting more and more love and care etc. into the relationship as the abuser puts in progressively less.
Now, an abused woman thinks if she keeps putting in 100%, the day will come when she will be met with the same 100%. Except she won't. Because that would make 200%.
Moments
If I could live my life over again, the next time I would try to make more mistakes. I wouldn't try to be so perfect, I'd relax more. I'd be more foolish than I have been; in short, I'd take very few things seriously.
I would be less hygenic. I would take more risks and go on more trips; I'd watch more sunsets, climb mountains, swim more rivers. I'd go to more places I have never been to, eat more ice cream and fewer lima beans. I'd have more real problems and few imaginary ones.
I was not one of those people who lived every moment of his life sensually and abundantly. Of course, I had my happy moments, but if I could go back, I'd try to have only good times. But, in case you don't know it, that's what life is made of...only moments; don't miss out on the NOW.
I was one of those who never went anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, an umbrella and a parachute. If I could live again, I'd travel more lightly.
If I could live again, I'd walk around barefoot from the beginning of spring until the end of autumn. I'd take more spins around the merry-go-round, contemplate more sunrises and play with more children...if I had another life to live. But you see, I'm 85 years old and I'm dying.
-The last poem written by Argentine writer Jorge Luis Borges
I would be less hygenic. I would take more risks and go on more trips; I'd watch more sunsets, climb mountains, swim more rivers. I'd go to more places I have never been to, eat more ice cream and fewer lima beans. I'd have more real problems and few imaginary ones.
I was not one of those people who lived every moment of his life sensually and abundantly. Of course, I had my happy moments, but if I could go back, I'd try to have only good times. But, in case you don't know it, that's what life is made of...only moments; don't miss out on the NOW.
I was one of those who never went anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, an umbrella and a parachute. If I could live again, I'd travel more lightly.
If I could live again, I'd walk around barefoot from the beginning of spring until the end of autumn. I'd take more spins around the merry-go-round, contemplate more sunrises and play with more children...if I had another life to live. But you see, I'm 85 years old and I'm dying.
-The last poem written by Argentine writer Jorge Luis Borges
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Prayer For Abused Women
Living God, lover of all whom you have created, we lift to you our prayers on behalf of women whose husbands or boyfriends have abused them through word or deed. Grant unto them the courage to leave a destructive relationship, the perseverance to struggle to create a new life, the hope of tender love once again. Amen
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