I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.
I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better know something.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do.
I've learned that it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it.
I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides.
I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I've learned that it's a lot easier to react than it is to think.
I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I've learned that learning to forgive takes practice.
I've learned that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it.
I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I've learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down may be the ones to help you get back up.
I've learned that I'm getting more and more like my grandma, and I'm kinda happy about it.
I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I've learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I've learned that you should never tell a child her dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if she believed it.
I've learned that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological.
I've learned that no matter how good a friend someone is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I've learned that sometimes when my friends fight, I'm forced to choose sides even when I don't want to.
I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I've learned that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.
I've learned that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I've learned that if you don't want to forget something, stick it in your underwear drawer.
I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I've learned that the clothes I like best are the ones with the most holes in them.
I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.
I've learned that there are many ways of falling and staying in love.
I've learned that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves, get further in life.
I've learned that many things can be powered by the mind, the trick is self-control.
I've learned that no matter how many friends you have, if you are their pillar, you will feel lonely and lost at the times you need them most.
I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I've learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I've learned that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains.
I've learned that the paradigm we live in is not all that is offered to us.
I've learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon.
I've learned that although the word "love" can have many different meanings, it loses value when overly used.
I've learned that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.
I've learned that no matter how fast or how far you go, you can't outrun God.
I've learned that no matter how far away I've been, He'll always welcome me back.
I've learned that love is not for me to keep, but to pass on to the next person I see.
I've learned that even if you do the right thing for the wrong reason, it's still the wrong thing to do.
8 comments:
Rachel: What a great example of an "ethical will." I am in the process of preparing for a workshop on spritual journaling for a local group and had planned on saying a few words about ethical wills. In addition I would like to feature this in my blogs and eZines--with your permission.
I can be reached at ellent@wellwriting.org OR through my website: https://www.healthaftertrauma.com
Ellen Taliaferro, MD
This is a wonderful post, thank you for sharing!
i recently ended a pretty detremental relationship, and though i am slowely learning that only i can will myself to move on, this entry helped me to find strength and remember why i am so proud to be a woman. i have bookmarked the site and plan to read these inspiring entries when i doubt or question myself or my own instinct. thankyou so much for your empowering words.
I've learned that the more you help others, the more you help yourself.... in the most amazing ways. I've been trying to be a 'flash nomad' (blog journalist) but when it wasn't until a friend's cry for help to save her daughter turned me into a 'flash gorilla' that wonderful things started to happen to me as I helped my friend. I wrote about it on http://www.flashnomad.com The same process could work for you.
Thanks for the blog, it's inspiring. I am a woman who survived a phyically and psyvhologically abusive realtionship which left me feeling anything but confidet and loved. I am still fighting to to stand up o my feet and to see my son. I have also started blogging about my life story hopefully inspiring abused women to move on as well...
What an inspiring blog I am also part of the thousand's of women that have been abused.healingabusedwomen.com is also a great website for advice for healing abused women and preventing abuse in the future.
I have just published my autobiography, which discusses a number of topics, but sexual abuse is a major theme. I struggled for most of my life to understand and overcome the effects of sexual abuse. I wrote my autobiography primarily to help other women who have had similar experiences, and to help men get an understanding. Love and light to you. Marlis
Two excerpts from the book, From Now to Now, by Marlis Jermutus
www.amazon.com/Now-Marlis-Jermutus/dp/0615448933/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1300767958&sr=1-1
. . . As we rode home I was still sobbing. The experience of breathing in his heavy breath, and his heavy body crushing down on me would stay with me for life. He stopped the bike before we got home. He turned to me and with a very threatening manner demanded that I not say anything to my mother. And so I didn’t.
Living in the now, I should immediately put that experience behind me, and let it disappear into the invisible past. That had been my habit and my ability. Hunger, the sound of a bomb exploding, the loss of family - all these things I had always let go of in the worlds I created out of each moment. My life, from now to now, always moved forward with my heart’s intuition as my guide. I was that joyful little child who brought a smile to the face of a Russian soldier. Now I was riding on the back of a bicycle behind a man from my own family who had just abused me. And I promised not to say anything. Maybe if I had not made that promise I could have let go of the experience somehow. I could have returned to the now. But I had to return home and act like nothing happened. Until that day, I always felt like I was the one who created each new moment. Those bad experiences I put behind me in each new moment seemed to stay safely in the past. This experience was different. This fear affected every part of my being. I thought of nothing as I rode on the back of the bicycle, I only sobbed and shook in fear, but turning in me was the uncontrollable reality. I really didn’t even know what had just happened to me, but I was in pain and terrified by my sudden horrifying vulnerability. Over the coming days I handled my fear by acting unafraid. I was always a good actor, but part of my strength as a child actor came from the security of knowing my mother would protect me. Suddenly, now, my mother could not protect me. For the next eight years, until I left my parent’s house, I was a very good actor . . .
. . . This was the beginning of a pattern, a pattern burned into my consciousness and only healed decades later after years of serious effort. Before I was old enough to leave home, I suffered the abuse that I think must be common in all the male-dominated cultures on the planet. After I was on my own, I was still not free of the pattern as I continued to let misguided men abuse me. For the longest time I remained silent. For the longest time I was unable to even understand that part of my psychology. Then the work began. Now I am finally free of that old part of me. Now I can see it clearly. Now I can describe my experience.
I first felt fear and physical pain, and then mental anguish. Then I carried the secret. This was a secret that only two people shared. In my trauma, I began to unconsciously feel that I was part of a shameful conspiracy. I began to feel guilty. I didn’t think about this. I felt it. I was too young to understand the psychological trap, but my subconscious mind knew only that I agreed to the horrible secret, so I must be guilty . . .
Thanks for your post! I really enjoyed reading it. Moreover, I would like to offer anyone who need help to contact AFH Ministries ( www.helpforwomen.net ). It is an organization which helps abused women by involving them into women therapy and training program which is free of charge !
Post a Comment