We live in a society where ‘love rules’. We have rules and principles that govern our head, but our heart ‘has its reasons of which reason knows nothing’ according to Blaise Pascal. In other words, we feel justified in following blindly when our emotions (and hormones) are powerfully swayed.
My current favourite quote is this African proverb: “Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.” For everyone who has ever done just that in a relationship and come close to drowning, I offer the following emotional principles.
1) I will not, ever, accept that anyone has a right to treat me contemptuously.
2) I will not accept that anyone has a right to disregard my feelings.
3) I will not accept that anyone else’s difficulties give them the right
to visit their frustrations on me.
4) I will not, ever, own the harsh, critical comments that anyone makes about me.
5) I understand that everyone is responsible for their own beliefs and behaviours.
6) I am prepared to be held accountable for my own mistakes.
7) I will not make excuses or cover up for another person.
8) I will not accept that anyone has the right to routinely visit judgment or blame on me.
9) I do not accept that anyone, ever, has a right to visit their moods on me at will.
10) I will not ever minimise the importance of my feelings.
11) I will not accept that anyone else has the right to minimise the importance of my feelings.
12) I do not accept that anyone has a right to silence me, or disregard my point of view.
13) I have an inalienable right to be heard.
14) I have an inalienable right be treated with respect at all times.
15) I do not accept that differences of opinion can ever be resolved by intimidation.
16) Whatever the situation, I am always the human equal of every other person.
17) I expect and require reciprocity in my relationships.
18) My time and effort are valuable. I require their value to be recognised.
19) I do not accept that anyone ever has a right to criticise my worth as a human being.
20) I accept and honour my right to care for and nurture myself at all times.
-www.joyfulcoaching.com
No comments:
Post a Comment